I have magical powers, no really...

Ok, I have wasted this entire week, seriously!  I got our vacation laundry done, which was quite a task in and of itself, but other than that and vacuuming...NOTHIN'!  So.... I am going to try and accomplish something today.  1st up: Tell you about my super powers which include:

1. thinking I can wash wool

2. thinking I can put ANYTHING in the dishwasher.

I don't know why I believe myself to have these super powers because they seem to fail me every time!  It started back in college when I washed a wool sweater of my Dads.  When I pulled it out of the dryer (oh, did I mention I also believe I can DRY wool) it fit me.  My dad is 6'1", I am 4' 11-3/4".  Six years ago the power seemed to come back to me when I threw a really cute Free People wool sweater in the wash, it came out size 2T, well except for the belt, which apparently wasn't wool and still about 4-1/2 feet long!  This time the sweater went to Darling!

Look what a little chunky monkey my baby was!!  Seriously, I can't quit laughing at this picture!  She looks like a (very cute) little Asian munchkin!  I swear I don't remember her being a chunk, she has always been SO tiny!  Oh, she is growing up WAY too fast...WAY too fast!

So anyway, my next super power started with a great idea... washing the paint brush I'd just used on my WALLS in the HOT dishwasher.  Ever see a dishwasher and dishes covered with cooked pieces of khaki paint?  I have!!  Several years later I had these adorable red glasses (i KNOW, i KNOW!!!).  One day I noticed how dirty they are between the lens and frame, so I think "geesh, I bet I could deep clean these babies in the dishwasher!!".  I put them on the top rack, 'cause I'm cautious like that and head out to run some errands.  As I pull out of my driveway I think "hmmm, i wonder if the heat dry cycle is going to be good for those frames?"...  I wish I had a picture but maybe you can picture what a HOT dishwasher does to a pair of plastic frames...it wasn't pretty!  It was actually quite sculptural!

Oh, now that you know I'm a Super Dork, I'm going to go do something that does not include plastic, wool or heat!

Check back tomorrow for Random Friday!!

The LOVE Boat...where's Gopher?

Remember that show? Didn't you love it?  There REALLY is a lido deck, it always cracks me up when they mention something happening on the Lido Deck.

I wouldn't really compare our ship to the Love Boat...although,  there was a "Singles Seeking Healthy Relationship" group on the boat.  Yes, I did spy in on one of their meetings, but No, I didn't think it appropriate to ask for photos of their group. I know me thinking something was inappropriate doesn't happen often, so sit back and enjoy my moment of classiness!! 

Let's hit the highlights of our trip:

1st up- Me being a goofball (Southbeach in the background, or as I like to call it "the life I was meant to have").  Let me tell you it was WINDY this year.  I went back here and ran on the track one night.  When I ran up the right side it was ALL I could do to put 1 foot in front of the other, but when I got on the back side it was like someone put rocket fuel in my pants! The wind blew so hard I ran like I've never run before, I should have had the Mister take some video.

 Our room with balcony- if you ever go, GET THE BALCONY!  I ❤ to sit out there, drink coffee and listen to the ocean!!  I ❤❤❤ the water!!

kind of a sexy pose for a towel animal, don't ya think?...

 Deep fried rat?  

Nope, just a stuffed pepper.

1st stop: Grand Turk

Speedo, yes! and you are WELCOME!

2nd stop: a private island owned by Carnival Cruise lines...

Half Moon Cay.

I can't even begin to tell you how GORGEOUS it was! Pure white sand that was like baby powder, the most neon turquoise blue water I've ever seen...absolute paradise!  There weren't even shells in the water or on the beach, it was like sugar baby!!

If you get the chance to go, take it!!

The last place we went Nassau. I took several pictures but the files are huge and I don't know how to re size them for my blog...shocking, I know!  This is already so photo heavy I hope it didn't blow a nut on your computer or anything!

Last photos, taken just for you...

The man who sat next to me at karaoke, he, obviously, was in love with his own foot- he couldn't keep his hands off it!!

A sign as we were headed to the airport and by sign, I mean "a sign"...

 2 people obviously 

a: begging to show up on chinamommy, 

b: exhausted from resting all week!

 The sun is out here in Michigan, I gotta hurry and get outside before it starts to snow!

Clint Black has a crush on me and other breaking news...

Yes, that's right, Clint Black has a crush on me....but first let's back it up a bit.

Friday night I got around to packing, we didn't leave till Saturday around 11:30 AM but I was being all organized and responsible for some weird reason!  On Saturday we met our friend, who was also going on the cruise, and headed to Chicago to catch our flight.  Now those of you who have been reading for a while know I am no fan of flying 

(green is the actual color of my face during flight, there is no color correction going on here!)

so I had my bottle of xanex strapped to my thigh and was ready to go.  As we're on the road I check twitter and have a message from someone saying "I hope you aren't flying Southwest."  I yell up to the Mister "Hey, who are we flying with", he replies "Southwest, why?".  Apparently Southwest was having a little problem keeping the roof on it's planes...too bad I didn't pack my glue gun!

Southwest Airlines Responds to Loss of Pressurization Event  on Flight From Phoenix to Sacramento

DALLAS, April 1, 2011 /PRNewswire via COMTEX/ -- Southwest Airlines Flight 812, the scheduled 3:25 pm  departure from  Phoenix to Sacramento today, diverted to Yuma, Ariz  due to loss of  pressurization in the cabin. Upon safely landing in Yuma,  the flight crew  discovered a hole in the top of the aircraft.  So anyway, we get to Midway in Chicago (we were one of the ONLY flights to leave on time!), get through security, grab some pizza and I wait for the xanex to kick in!  It's just a cattle call to get on the plane.  I grabbed a seat next to 2 cutie girls that had no idea what they were in for: the chinamommy show! I know you'll be shocked but I chatted these 2 girls up the whole way to FL and before we knew it, we were on the ground and the roof was still on the plane!!! If you girls are reading "hey!!" We didn't get into Ft. Lauderdale until late Saturday, so we grabbed our swag bags and then headed to our room. {I really stunk at taking play-by-play pictures this year.}  We had a beautiful room at the Westin but... on the bathroom was a sliding shutter door (think Japanese style) and a window to the bedroom with shutters on it.  Ummmm, who can poop when you KNOW the person on the other side can totally hear everything!?  Ok, like you really wanted to know that, hun? Sunday we got up, headed to the beach and OH MY... We just don't usually see this stuff at Lake Michigan! (the shadow from his bag is covering up the 2 inches of crack hanging out) The girl chasing him (the Coppertone guy) with her camera is with our group, maybe she has a blog too?! We also saw a guy in a pink bikini... again, I didn't have my camera ready and someone else told me he wanted paid to have his picture taken. Saturday night Clint Black gave our group a private concert.  To be honest, I wasn't sure of 1 song that Clint sang, but I knew it would be fun...and it was! We got to be in the front row, just feet from the stage, Yes, I'm really this close to him!  ~whose thumbs think they are super stars?~ So back to why I know Clint has a crush on me... Several times during the show we made eye contact, it helped that I was center stage in the front row!  After the concert they did an encore and Clint played the drums, when it was over, he came center stage, looked me in the eyes and tossed me the drumstick!   I was SO glad it wasn't a chicken drumstick!  It was like there was a magnet in my hand; I've never caught anything in my life!!  Ok, maybe Clint was making eye contact so he didn't bonk me on the head with that stick, I'm going to stick with my crush theory, I mean seriously-his wife Lisa and I are like twins with our black dresses and our "twins"... Well, do I know how to make a long story longer, or what?  Tomorrow we'll get on the ship...

I'm calling to tell you I'll call you later...

So, one morning as I'm dropping Darling off at school, I see my pal dropping off her son so I call her.  As soon as she picks up I realize, I can't talk right then because I've got to get Darling out of the car without letting Theodore (the Yorkie) take off like a rocket ship to Mars (sorry, Charlie, I couldn't help myself).  So basically as soon as she picked up I said "Hey, I'll call you in a minute" and she says "soooooo, you called me to tell me you'll call me later?"  Me: "yeah, pretty much. bye".  Don't give me your phone #!

The point of this whole rambling... to tell you I'm home and I'll blog later...like, tomorrow!

(Me and my giant forearm at Margaritaville in Grand Turk)

If that doesn't lure you back, I obviously don't know you well....

10 Random Things Friday...

1. Did this week fly like a Rocket Ship to Mars, or WHAT?  I swear every single day I was running to the mall, running to the dentist, running to the school, just running... Every night I would think: I should sit down and blog and get ready to be gone a week, but NO... it just never happened.  I don't often have crazy busy weeks so I was a little out of sorts.

2. Found 2 pair of shoes yesterday, the Nike's are size 6, i wear a 5.  (A young girl saw these and kept yelling "Mom, Mom, I found shoes that look just like pants, they look just like PANTS!"... OK, they're like sweat pant material, but I was like "SHUT UP and use your inside voice kid!!".) 

 and the sandal's are a size 3 kids...

3. Darling is growing her hair out for Locks of Love.  She HATES to have her hair brushed, we'll see if we can make it that long or maybe they'll just have to cut a 9 inch snarl out of the back of her head.  Anyone else ever done this?  I recently heard a little bit of bad press regarding L of L... any opinions?  Is there someone better to donate to?

4. I wanted a maxi dress for the beach party our cruise group is having for us (Did I mention Clint Black is doing a PRIVATE party/concert for just the 711 of us in our group?!?! I have NO idea what he sings... but still, it's going to be FABULOUS!).  Maxi dresses are NOT for those of us under 5' tall...

Yeah, the dog is like "Yikes, she's got Tigers blood" and it's nice and blurry because Darling said she was shaky cause she hadn't had breakfast.  And yes, I'm wearing this over my PJ's cause I'm fancy and just woke up!

See the footprint on my dress?  When I was leaving the dressing room I walked right up on this dress TWICE and almost wiped out...NICE!  and yes, someone did see me do it!  I'm off to see if my alternation guy can shorten it by tomorrow, who is he gonna love, and possibly over-charge?! (It's really black, it looks navy on my computer...)

5. Yesterday was a Young Authors event at Darlings school for 2nd graders.  This is her research book (RESEARCH books in 2nd grade?! Wow, I was so impressed!!)

Want to know about Hamsters?...

I mean...AWESOME Hamsters!

6. Well, after a whole YEAR of dental work...

I AM done!!!

Don't even ask what this mouth is worth!!

$$$$$

Braces, whitening, a dental implant...

I know it looks like my teeth lean to the left, it's the camera angle, I promise!!

and the ruffle around my neck, you ask?....

I KNOW!! I LOVE it!  This is the one NYC had to ship me.  PS: someone please give me a suggested wall color, that yellow ventian plastic mess is making me puke!!!!

7.  I made another square for my quilt this week.  I haven't crocheted in forever and now summer is coming and I usually crochet even less, so who knows when this quilt will ever get done.  Then, to make matters worse I used a bigger crochet hook and duh...

they aren't the same size.  Any good ideas what to do with a single granny square?

8.  Be careful going down a hill on a plasma car wearing your (kinda new-at Christmas) jammies

9. I am searching for my favorite Keurig coffee...so far, it is NOT the Green Mountain. one.  Do you have a favorite??  Newman's Own is in the lead...

 10. We fly out of Chicago tomorrow night, don't try to break into my house, we have house sitters and anything of real value is on my body (my wedding ring and teeth).  This is my flight suit, but it's missing one thing, yes, pants!! OK, it's missing 2 things: pants and my XANEX!!!  I'm having a mini panic attack right now because I'm not positive where it is (the Xanex, not the pants).  I think I'm more afraid I'll be afraid (I don't fly that well...) so I DO NOT fly without my meds!!!

Last year when we went on the cruise I was so good and pre-set blog posts.  I just didn't this year, so take a weeks break and come back to hear all about my adventures, 'cause you know it will happen!!

I'll miss you....XOXO!

Who is Robert Bunsen?

Yes, Yes, I'M ALIVE!! I have been SO CRAZY busy and today is no different!  But before I talk about that for 2 seconds, who is Robert Bunsen?  I saw a thing today on The Nate Burkus Show about how to grow your blog.  One recommendation was to search google trends and see what was trending.  How out of it are you when you only recognize 3 of the 10 items?! These are the ones I know: #6 Opening day (I believe that's something to do with baseball), #9 The Bible and #10 Ohio... really, Ohio is trending? Is something big happening in the Buckeye state??  I don't have time to check... ANYWHOOOO.... So busy shopping for things to wear on the cruise.  It takes me FOREVER because I have to go to 564 stores to find 2 things to fit... I can hear you all crying for me- shut up!  Anyway, I'm off again today but right in the middle of the day I have a young authors thing to go to at Darlings school.  They've been doing research books (this is 2nd grade people!!) and my sweeties is about "Hamsters", I saw a sneak peek, it is adorable!!

Hang in there Random Friday is coming and I promise a full post tomorrow!!  Off like a prom dress....

I leave you with this cause she is SO stinking cute.  This is from 2007, she was 4 and she was fancy back then, obviously!!

just so ya know... I have missed blogging/you guys SO much this week...

10 Random Things Friday...

1. I went shopping yesterday, it was a success-I don't often say that.  If I were 7 inches taller it would do a world of help, I am not holding my breath...

 Dear Macy's thank you for takin' a chunk-a-change from me!

I use to shop at Macy's when it was Hudsons, I don't know why I hadn't been back, but I will, and that is a promise!

2. I got this jacket in grey, but...they have to ship my size from NYC!  

(Macy's would not allow me to take the bigger picture from their site, but this is the actual size of the jacket i ordered.)

I had the exact same thing happen with a sweater at Christmas.  Whoever that little woman in my city is, she has EXCELLANT taste and keeps stealin' my size!

3. Do you ever get something that is totally NOT you?  You see it, you think "why not?", take it in the dressing room and yell "Fashizzel" and you gotsta, gotsta have it?  Well that happened with this:

I know, I know...it looks a little like your Grandma's scarf, but I'm telling you, it's cute on! I wouldn't have believed it either.

4. PINK, PINK, PINK

5. Watch out Charlie Sheen's Goddesses! 

I <3 this dress!  

(and it's NOT as peachy as it appears in the picture)

and... there is a gem missing under my right arm so I got 15% off AND my shopping pal, BRAT (Beautiful Rich and Thin mom of 3) had Macy's coupons!! $41 for this dress, not bad, hun?!

6.   Size 5?!?!?!!!!! 

Aldo, I now know YOU are my real friend, but if you ever get rid of size 5 shoes i'll punch you in the face.  Oh yes, the joys of having tiny bound Chinese feet... Do you know that even my boyfriend Target is starting their sizes at a 5-1/2?  Shameful Target, shameful!!!

7. We will be spending our Saturday afternoon at the school Carnival...

Darling is soooooooo excited, The Mister and I...well, let's just say we're going to enjoy every minute of her youth, cause it's not gonna last for long :(

I know...this picture is GOOD! Can you believe I took it?!  See how it's all in focus, but blurry in the background?!  Oh, who thinks she's giving Ansel Adams a run for his $$?

8.

This is for sale in my 2nd etsy shop here:

www.etsy.com/shop/papercutsarecute

9. This photo is beyond disappointing after the ticket photo I realize, but I have GOT to get in the shower! I ran this morning (4.71 miles, thank you!) and I'm starting to smell myself...

This is the stack of pages I've got "done" during my recent scrapbooking frenzy!  Ok, I say "done" because my one friend (Scrappy Hitler) says they aren't done because I didn't put a title or journaling on each page.  I say I've got 8 photo boxes FULL and if I just get 'em on paper I'm calling them DONE!

10. 

Peeps in the HOUSE 'yo!

Smell ya later cats, have a GREAT weekend!!!

xoxo

OH, bonus randomness, go check my pal's blog for a GREAT giveaway!!

she wears crazy well

This girl is gonna crack you up!!

Independent Fashion designers on etsy.

We're getting ready to go on our annual cruise soon (don't try to come steal my collection of Q-tips used by celebrity's, my parents are house sitting!).  This girl needs something to wear, because of course, I have NOTHING to wear and I HATE everything I do own!

So last night I was grazing on etsy and look at all these CUTE custom pieces!!

The shop name is below each item and will take you to their shop.  Go see... I am amazed that people can actually SEW like this....I can't imagine being able to make something like this!

RiverOfRomansk (I could have put every one of her designs on here...the way I dream of dressing!)

Penni Pops Designs (you had me at pink!)

Flutter (I know one of the designers at this shop, she is a doll! Go check their ruffled collars!!!)

ThongbalTaTong (this mix match style is my FAVE, totally me!!)

and then some store bought goodies (although just not as much character and style as the handmade!):

jcrew
So I'm headed out today to shop, it's always a challenge when you're 4' 11 3/4" short.  Wish I could buy some leg length!!!
Where do you shop the most?  I'll admit, TJ Maxx gets a lot of my clothing $, they have an odd assortment of items and I can sometimes find weird sizes.  Do you ever buy custom clothing on etsy (or anywhere else)?  Favorite items this season??  Least favorite items this season?  I'll tell you one thing i am NOT excited about...those little floral prints that were so big in the 80's, I was over those in 1989!
Happy Thursday!  We have a 2 hour ice delay this morning... 
Welcome to Michigan Spring!!