Monday, June 15, 2009

Excuse me, is that a dent in your boob?

I know my title has you on the edge of your seat, but 1st let me harass you about voting for me (see the icon on the side) EVERY day until July 6th (or was it 7th?, i think it's the 6th...). You'll find me in the "FUNNIEST" category & even though i may not be the FUNNIEST, i want to win & i'm only behind by over 1,000 votes- put on your rally cap!!

The pressure of being voted "funniest" has put much undo pressure on me, i mean seriously, i can't fall asleep at night worrying about what i could possibly say that would rocket me into the position of FUNNIEST... i don't know that this will do it, but this is it for today: i was getting ready to wash a couple bras this weekend & it got me thinking about MY bras. A few years ago (the most terrible time in my life) when i was at a place where i could only buy a bra at Target (not that i don't LOVE that place) or TJ Maxx, i didn't realize the slums my boobs were residing in. Now, let me say: my boobs do NOT deserve the Taj Mahal hall, nor do they need that type of support!

There are certain ladies in my life (whom shall remain nameless) that DO need this this type of support & when they told me the price they were paying for these large luxury suites, i could NOT believe it! I felt like a BIG spender if i paid $9.99! Well, anyway i went on with my $7.99 low income apt bras for years not realizing the benefit of a $38 + bra even for us tiny gals. You see, the problem with a bra that costs $7.99 is this: they try to be nice & give us a little "boost" with some cheap foam and do you know what happens when you throw cheap foam in the wash? Yep, it gives you the look of someone who slammed their boob in a door! I spent years walking around with these tiny deformed boobs! EVERY bra i had was misshapen with a big fold across one boob or a large dent. Now, i probably should have been babying these cheap bras & washing them by hand in special soap, but i guess at that time i thought i could just throw them in with the regular laundry & they would come out looking like their brand new $7.99 self! I will say i did use one of those lingerie bags (& then spent 20 minutes untangling them after the wash) after a mishap with a strap getting hooked around the center of the washer & making a strap large enough to go around 10 people! So anyway the Christmas right before my Mister & i got married, he surprised me with a matching set from.... VICTORIA's SECRET! Have you read the Shopaholic series by Sophie Kinsella? The character Becky has this thing where she goes from one shopping obsession to another: 1st she is all about clothing, then it's luggage, then housewares.... Well, i can identify with this character in a few ways. I would just be nuts about socks (& yes, i have tons!), then maybe it would be pajama pants, then jeans... anyway, i just never caught on that i should be focusing on BRAS! When i first saw the $ amount the mister had paid for that tiny bra, my mouth fell open... i mean really, it's a 34A for crying out loud (no secrets on this blog ladies!!). BUT then... i tried it on & my girls sang with glee! The straps (thought they do have an easy job on me) were so soft-no scratchy fake lace, the color so pink, and the CUPS (if you want to call them that on an "A")- so smooth! After the 1st washing i was sold! Yes, i did gentle cycle, but that had never made a difference before. I can't tell you the joy when i pulled that bra out & she was in the same shape as the day i got her! So here it is, over a year later & that 1st VS bra was NOT my last! I am here to tell you, i will never go back to those bent, deformed, dented bras again. I remember talking with some of my friends about how i would NEVER pay $__.__ for a STINKING BRA!!!! Well, that is not true & i am so happy to be dent-free!

i'm a BELIEVER!!!!

7 comments:

Scrappy Jessi said...

hey sweets,
ok ok,
i updated!!
tee hee
oxoxo,
jessi

Amber Zimmerman said...

Haha. . .this post is hilarious and I can SOOOOoo relate! I have purchased the "water bra" from Target as sadly enough, my girls need some help. I loved how velupuous (?) I felt when I wore that. I had shape and for the first time - you could tell whether I was coming or going! ;-) That is, until one of the cups leaked. =( Now I am in search of something to replace the beloved water bra. Thanks for your very sweet comment on my blog!
xo

Amber Zimmerman said...

Voted for ya girl! ;-)

Kugo said...

I so agree with the bra post. Sadly, my girls do need help, all the help they can get. I spend more on my bra than the shirt I wear on top of them.

Kugo said...

P.S. Love your tunes!

glitter girl said...

As a girl who left those foam training wheels behind LOOOONG ago, I will share some thoughts anonymously. For years I have had to spend a small fortune on DD's. Yes, I officially HATE bra shopping! It is no fun to go on the hunt for a super-sturdy, mac daddy, does this come with bolts to anchor these puppies down, kinda bra...let alone to find one that is actually "pretty". It is pure torture! Only to find that after you find something you like, buy it and go back a few months later for more, they have quit making them...AHHH!!! They were probably trying to conserve fabric and lace.... Anyways, on to the "EL CHEAPO" bras (Which I never buy! I mean, SERIOUSLY!! Who are they kidding? I've seen toilet paper sturdier than some of those things! I really think that the bras start quivering on the racks when I walk down the cheapie bra aisle, and I swear I have seen an underwire or two pop right out of a bra and go shooting across the store in fear!) Well, back to the story...The cheapies are a big joke! Yes, Wal-Mart ot Target may HAVE my size, however, they are usually...are you ready?... PADDED!! I mean, c'mon people! REALLY? Do my girls look like they need to look any BIGGER? Foam pads do not equal support! And let's just get this out there, there is a definite cut off as to when foam padding is appropriate in a bra, and when it isn't. Double D's stand alone. They don't need pillows, or a "boost". If anything they need to be hauled up by some heavy duty pulley system and welded in place. They say gravity is not a lady's friend, and I dread to think of what may happen when I am sixty...UGH!! Anyways, just wanted all of you small chested people to know that it is not any more fun being at the opposite, expanded end of the bra strap!

♥zoe♥ said...

OMG! I LOVE THIS POST SO MUCH AND I'M TOTALLY FORGET ABOUT MY HUNGRY STOMACH!!!! you are such a funny lady *TeeHee*

Voted for you girl!
YOu deserve this more than anyone else!

xoxo
Zoe

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