Ok, kinda dumb because if anyone's had a break the last couple of years it's me! BUT... I am the one that puts all these pressure's on myself. The pressure of becoming famous, the pressure of taking Theblackapple's #1 spot on etsy as the top seller, the pressure of trying to make everyone hang on my every word... I guess it's harder to be narcissistic than i thought!!
I couldn't even enjoy these anymore, I was too busy looking for "IDEAS".
Don't worry, I won't be taking a break from my blog, just a break from working on my millions! I've noticed lately that I'm just not enjoying my time at home anymore. I've wanted for YEARS AND YEARS to be able to stay home and now I can and so many times I find that i'm down.... WHY??? OCD runs in my family (great!) and I've become so OCD about forcing myself to make "stuff" to sell to make millions that I no longer am enjoying even GOING to my studio! All I ever think is "what can I make next" and "will this sell?" instead of just creating to create and that, my friends, is a recipe for disaster! The more I made that I didn't sell, the more down I was getting on myself! I want to make stuff for ME, I want to make stuff for friends, I want to make stuff for my darling daughter... I even want to make stuff to give away here on my blog!!
So, like Bob,
I'm taking a vacation from my problems!
I feel better already! I'm kinda thinking if I quit trying so hard, I may actually find myself as an artist... whoa, how awesome would that be?! The mister is getting his buddy, Sparks the electrician, over to hook up my kiln soon and then... I'm going to be elbow deep in clay as much as I possibly can! I've already promised myself to make darling and I jewelry, to make stuff for MY home and to do what I want without the obsessive "maybe i can sell this" thought!
Ok, enough about my fake problems!
Picture overload coming right up:
Cute tanks from Old Navy
a Coral one from TJ Maxx (oh, how I love this place...)
do you know that Coral is the color that looks good on everyone?!
a skirt from TARGET (makes me want to say shimmy, shimmy coco pops)
speaking of coco:
I forgot I took these, my experimentation of "Can a 41 year old wear knee socks with a skirt and not look LOL Ridiculous?"
love that lavender squiggle up the back...
Recently a friend said "have you been on vacation? you're so tan!".... Ewww, that means my make-up is too dark! I kept thinking I looked like an extra on Jersey Shores!
M-WOW!
So... I grabbed this... out of the tube white, on my skin, skin color!! how does it do that?
Good bye mineral powder orange tan girl!
Eeeeek!! CUTE!?
I started this yesterday on day 1 of my "vacation":
and darling and I worked on this:
Now I'm all ZEN and going to go get on my treadmill...
OH and if you WANT to vote for my blog interview, look at yesterdays post and follow the link- but that's all I'm going to say about that, cause I'm all in the zen-zone!
Ooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmm!
3 comments:
I cannot tell you how much I love this post. I am so with you. I pressure myself to "be someone" and make money so I can feel that I contribute. Then in the process. . I neglect my kids. :( The whole reason that I do those things to begin with. Completely relate. I have to give myself that pep talk often.
I love the links. . .those tanks! Yowz. I haven't been to Old Navy in forevah. It's time. The cricut cartridge! You stole my owl lovein' heart with those. :-) Have a good Friday girlie!
OH! I have been there- boy, have I been there!!!
I will try to make a long story short-
Several years before my mom passed away, we started going to this pottery class at a local church- for fun. After a bit, we had so much pottery but still enjoyed making it. We decided to get a kiln and start doing craft shows. We LOVED it, had a great time...Then my mom got sick. She really could not keep up the pace and I started making personalized pottery on my own and it really caught on. She would go with me sometimes to my shows and sometimes she could not if the chemo had her down.
Anyway- I signed up for this one show and they asked me if they could put my pieces on the brochure. Of course I said yes, got excited... the day of the show- I got SWAMPED!!! So many people came just to see me. I didn't want to turn anyone down and I ended up taking over $3000 in orders that day.-all special orders- well, I was way in over my head. The show was in early October and I worked right up till Christmas trying to get finished. My phone rang non stop with people wanting to know where there orders were. They didn't understand that I was just one person, there was a waiting list, and pottery making is a several step process.
(Sorry my short story is now long) Anyway, it ruined my Christmas. I was a crab to everyone, and all in all I was just too tired to enjoy the holidays. Little did I know that that would be my last Christmas with my mom. She passed away the following April.
After that, I never let my pursuit of fame and money control me. Last Christmas when I had so many ornament orders in my shop, I shut down early. I have learned to stay in control of the situation.
I think you are a lot like me though. I like making money. It is fun for me- kind of like some people play tennis, I think up ways to make cash. It's fun.
But never let the love of money take away the love of art. If it is more a chore than fun- it is time to quit.
Sorry if I sound "preachy"
Whenever I feel that way I take a break and make something for a friend-like maternity dresses for one who is pregnant-or a dress for my daughter. Just doing something that isn't attached to commerce inspires me and I can work again. Nice knee socks.
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